Sh*t Teams That Don’t Give a Sh*t Do and Why We Care

Just read a funnier than sh*t article on by Justin Halpern, the guy with the prolifically foul-mouthed father who wrote Sh*t My Dad Says and now has 3 million followers on Twitter. The article, Your Favorite Team Doesn’t Give a Damn About You, says what most of us know but can’t bring ourselves to admit about our favorite professional teams: None of these bloated franchises cares about their fans. How can they? After all, corporations don’t have feelings; they have balance sheets. Like Halpern’s dad’s beloved San Diego Chargers, they threaten to leave town for a better deal or a bigger stadium and we act like jilted lovers. Like we thought we had something special going, when it was really just an extended one-night stand.

And yet in this cynical and scandal-ridden age of ours, it’s quaintly heartening that fans still care that much about their teams — enough to sign petitions and call radio stations to keep them from leaving — when all logic says they’re not worth it. “Go. Who needs you, anyway?” we want to say…but can’t, with any feeling. Because the idea of these teams and the way they make us feel part of something bigger, connect us across generations, and bond us together through the years feels too important to let go of without a fight. We belong to them and they to us, in good times and in bad, through losing and championship seasons. To me, the fact that we still give a sh*t is just one of those strange but beautiful things about sports.

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